Brains Don't Mean A Thing When You're In love
by CandeeVictoria
Summary: Kyoya has noticed he's jealousy of Haruhi's attention from Tamaki.  As he begins to falls in love with Tamaki, a traumatizing secret from Tamaki's past may threaten the innocent attraction between the two of them.  Can he save Tamaki's heart? Tam/Kyo
1. Chapter 1

Chapter One

Jealousy

It all started when Kyoya woke up one morning, like any other day, but he couldn't wait to see Tamaki. He found it rather odd. Tamaki and Kyoya were "Mommy and Daddy" as considered by the Host Club of Ouran, but their relationship never exceeded less or more of friends. Yet why was he so eager to see him this morning? It was best described as a feeling of wanting to see a celebrity. He wanted to see him so bad, like he idolized him. The more he tried to shake the feeling away, the more it bugged him.

He got up and walked around his bedroom in his boxers. He bypassed the mirror on his way to the bathroom and he stopped to take a look at it. No one would guess, but Kyoya was actually very built and toned nicely underneath his school uniform. The blue blazer that was worn by the male students never did any justice to define a person's body. Though Kyoya was typically a good looking guy, there was something he never liked about himself, which he feebly slipped onto his face upon reaching to grab them from his dresser: his glasses. He though they were more of a nuisance to his look. No one else in the Host Club wore glasses except for Haruhi, but she wore contacts.

His mind drifted back to Tamaki. He had once told Kyoya that his glasses were what made him the "Cool Type" and they only "added to his sexiness". Kyoya always though glasses were the furthest thing from cool or sexy.

He stared just a bit longer at himself in the mirror and suddenly began to wonder what other people looking like in only their underwear. He thought about Haruhi, his fellow host club member. For her age, she was under-developed and he thought that she probably would look like nothing more than a mere preteen had he seen her in her underwear. She was a decent-looking girl, though not gorgeous. He thought of Renge, the newest female student in Ouran Academy. She was absolutely beautiful and a complete package included. A huge bust, fabulous buttocks you can see defined even through her long dress.

Normally, this sort of thought would make a boy drool and a little "manhood" stick up from behind his pants. But this wasn't the case with Kyoya. Usually he got an erection if he thought of girls. But lately his erections were quiet. He almost felt betrayed by his body. Today was especially difficult and he couldn't figure out why.

He slid out of his underwear and jumped into the shower, not much in the mood for his normal hot bath like usual. He washed his body and jumped out, wrapping the towel around his defined hips, and walked to the sink to brush his teeth. He always liked to keep a dashing smile. As his title as "The Cool Type" in the host club, Kyoya had to keep up with a smile to melt a girl's defense.

When he was finished brushing his teeth, he exited the bathroom, and walked to the closet on the opposite site of his bedroom. He pulled out his normal uniform and pulled it over his body, buttoning the shirt all the way day, and tucked it in his black trousers. He finished with his pale blue blazer and walked to the mirror to get a last glimpse at himself. As always, perfect.

He closed his closet, grabbed his messenger bag full of books, and head out to the front door to catch his ride to the academy.

ooOOoo

He entered the third music room, where the host club meetings were held, and immediately spotted Tamaki cooing over Haruhi. The host club was used to Tamaki's behavior towards Haruhi. He seemed to be infatuated with her and always seemed to try and please her, much to his dismay. It was still funny to see him try. But today watching Tamaki's demise was unpleasant to him and Kyoya quietly walked to his table and sat down, opening his messenger bag to pull out his black planning book to check his engagements for the afternoon.

"Are you ok, Kyoya-kun?" said the small adorable voice from behind. He wheeled around in his seat to find Honey, the third year student who looked more as though he could belong to the elementary wing.

He patted Honey's head, as he always did to reassure him, and said, "I'm perfectly fine, Honey-senpai. How about yourself?"

Honey's large eyes rounded even more, "I'm terrific today!"

Kyoya flashed him a smile and Honey ran back to his table to prepare for his engagements.

"Please, Haruhi?" Tamaki begged. Kyoya looked in his direction and saw Tamaki actually on his knees, clasping Haruhi's hand in his own, "Just this once, why don't you?"

Haruhi shook her head quickly, "Negative," she replied in her usual, monotone voice, "I have to help my father this weekend. I can't come see you again."

Again? Kyoya became particularly intrigued by the conversation.

"But who am I going to spend my free time with, Haruhi?" Tamaki asked, "Didn't we have fun last weekend?"

Haruhi looked at her feet for a second and then looked up. She blushed a little and replied in a small voice, "Yes, I actually did have fun…but I told you this weekend I couldn't do it again. I promised my father."

With that being said, Haruhi took her hand back and walked over to her table to prepare her engagements. Tamaki stood on the floor a little longer, staring into space. His normal reaction to Haruhi's refusal would be to pursue her even more. It was strange to see him give up so easily. Kyoya began to wonder just what happened the weekend before that he failed to hear about.

The door to the music room opened and the two final hosts entered with a greeting in unison: "Did you miss us?" It was the red-headed Hitachiin twins: Hikaru and Kaoru. They marched in together and took their seats. Kyoya figured they would know what was going on between Haruhi and Tamaki. They were extremely nosy, they knew all the latest gossip. So he got up to ask them.

"Good morning, senpai!" Hikaru greeted.

Kyoya replied in a quick smile, "Do you know what happened last week with Haurhi and Tamaki?"

"You mean you didn't hear?" Kaoru chimed in. Kyoya shook his head. The twins exchanged a look and smiled devilishly, "Senpai asked Haurhi to come over his house."

"For 'company', that was the reason," Hikaru added, "But you know senpai, it's always something bigger, isn't it?"

Kaoru nodded, "Yep, so we had to spy on them. Turns out, they went on a date."

"A date? Are you sure?" Kyoya asked, intrigued and completely dumbfounded that he hadn't heard of this sooner.

"Mmm-hmm," Hikaru said, "That's what it looked like. Senpai took her out to dinner and Haruhi wore a dress!"

Suddenly, out of nowhere, Kyoya's heart began beating fast.

"Haruhi got to try her fancy tuna, finally," Kaoru exclaimed, "And at the end of the night, Senpai sealed the deal with a kiss."

"You're lying," Kyoya chortled, though he would have liked to believe it was.

"We're totally serious!" Hikaru said, "It was a big, wet one too!"

Kyoya nodded, unable to bring himself to answer back. He dragged himself back to his table and slumped down on it, his heart still beating fast. He looked at Haruhi, so quiet and reserved. She always seemed to be so annoyed of Tamaki. How had he missed these little clues that could have pointed to this?

Then he looked at Tamaki. He imagined what Hikaru and Kaoru must have seen that night. Tamaki dressed nicely, like he usually dressed on his days off from school. Tamaki holding Haruhi's hand as he led her into the limo he used. Tamaki leaning forward at the end of the night and locking lips with Haurhi.

He closed his eyes and took deep breaths. Slowly, his heart ceased to race. He panted for a moment and opened his eyes, knitting his eye brows. He had never felt this way before and he hated this emotion.

Kyoya was jealous.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

An Awkward Position

The host club activities carried on as usual and Kyoya sulked on through them. Charming talk, cool smile, pour tea. Charming talk, cool smile, pour tea. He had the technique for wooing girls, but his heart wasn't in its place this morning. Every so often his mind would drift to what the twins had told him and why he had been so jealous of it. He figured it couldn't have been because he had a crush on Haruhi. Sure, he thought Haruhi was cute, but commoners didn't quite intrest him. Next to Mori, he was the only host who didn't develop feelings for her.

_Could it be…_he thought to himself, biting his lip in thought, _That I like…Tamaki? _He shook his head and laughed to himself. It was as if his brain was teasing him. Tamaki was a guy! Guys with guys don't like each other. Sure, the twins had their own homosexual front portraying at the host club but Kyoya knew just as much as anyone else that it was probably only an act. Could two twin brothers truly be in love with each other? The girls attending the host meetings only liked to watch the twins because it was cute to watch, and everyone knew had it been a real incestuous, homosexual love, the school would take it badly. They would shun them.

Homosexuality was looked down upon and was typically taboo in the school. Even at the host club there had been times of hostility towards the twins and their act.

The more Kyoya thought about the possibility of having a crush on Tamaki, the more he began to believe that it was true. He had always liked Tamaki for many reasons. His dreamy aqua eyes that glistened in the sunlight. The muscles he saw on him whenever the host club would change into their costumes. And his hair. Not many people in Japan had hair the color of Tamaki's. It was a dirty blonde, messy but in the same way perfect. Kyoya always wondered if his hair was soft.

The clock struck five in the noon and the host club meeting was officially over. The girls dispersed from their tables and went back to their dorms. Mori and Honey left together. They lived in the same prefecture. The twins left next, off to the same house as well.

"I'll see you later, Kyoya," Tamaki said with a smile, "I've offered to walk Haruhi home."

Kyoya felt another pang of jealousy but he quickly wiped it away, "See you after the weekend, then," he said and, with a bow, he watched the two exit the music room.

Kyoya slipped the rest of his books in his messenger bag and headed out the door. His ride, a black limousine with the flag of his family's crest in the back windshield, was parked in the front of the building when he exited. He opened the door and slid into his seat.

"Anywhere special tonight, Mr. Ootori?" Kyoya usually took drives to shops or the computer café as well as the ice cream stores on occasion. But Kyoya wasn't in the mood to go anywhere that night so he just shook his head and the driver shifted the gears to the limo and started over to the Ootori Mansion.

He gazed out of the tinted window at the passing scenery. _Ok. So you like Tamaki. _He shook his head at himself as though he were disgusted with his own thoughts. _Get over it. He won't like you back and he obviously likes Haruhi._

As the ride continued, he began to grow sad from the thought. Now that he was sure he liked Tamaki, but knowing that something was going on with him and Haruhi and that the two of them were kissing already, it made him feel terrible and the feeling wouldn't go away. He closed his eyes and imagined what it would be like if he were with Tamaki. He could imagine his arms tightly around Tamaki's waist in a sweet embrace, their lips locked together. It was almost as if he could feel it. He could even smell the familiar scent that Tamaki always smelled like, a fresh body cologne that smelled somewhat like Axe.

The car stopped in front of the Ootori estate. Embarrassed, Kyoya looked down at his pants and noticed a bulge protruding from it. He covered his face with one hand and the bulge with the other. It amazed him how his mind could become so vivid enough to raise a sexual rise in him.

To make matters worse, a call came through on his cell. It was Tamaki. Kyoya closed his eyes and picked up the phone with his free hand, still covering his erection and answered the phone.

"Hello?" he stammered.

"Kyoya," Tamaki answered, "Are you home yet?"

"Just got here but I'm still in the car," he said.

Tamaki was silent for a moment, "Are you ok?"

Kyoya pressed down on his erection, as if it would deflate it somehow. It only made it worse, "If only you knew, Tamaki."

"Knew what?"

He shook his head, though he was sure Tamaki wouldn't see it, "Forget it. I'm fine, just have a bit of a day, you know?"

"Yeah," Tamaki said, "But I was gonna ask you...do you think I could spend the night at your place?" A bead of sweat slid down Kyoya's face, "I'm having 'a day' too. And I sure as hell can't sleep over Haruhi's."

Kyoya finally felt his bulge die down at the mention of Haruhi's name, though he still kept his hand there, "You can come," he said, "I have some homework to do, but I should be done by seven."

Tamaki was silent for a moment yet again, "Do you...think I can come now?"

"Sure, but you'd have to wait for me to finish my homework," he answered, though he couldn't imagine how he can get anything done with Tamaki near him.

"That's fine," he answered, "Thanks a lot. I'll see you soon."

"See you."

The two of them hung up. Kyoya stood in the car a little while longer before he grabbed his school bag and went up to his room.

ooOOoo

There was a knock on the door, "Come in," Kyoya said, not looking up from his books. He figured he should have at least tried to get some homework done before Tamaki came back.

The door opened and Tamaki came in. Kyoya closed his books and slid them quietly into his bag. He zipped it up and wheeled around in his chair. Tamaki was still in his uniform, his messenger bag slung over his shoulder. It was as if he hadn't even went home and just came straight to Kyoya's.

"Did I upset you?" Tamaki asked, his voice deep with sincerity and apologetics.

"No," Kyoya said, surprised he would even ask such a question, "Why would you say that?"

Tamaki shrugged, looking down at the legs of the chair across the room, "You just seemed mad is all. Today, I mean. Like I did something."

"If I seemed mad, I'm sorry, but it wasn't about you," Kyoya answered.

Tamaki nodded, "You know...Mitsukini told me that the twins told you about me and Haruhi," Kyoya whipped his head around to face him directly. Tamaki laughed a bit in his throat, "I'm a little pissed they would spy on us, but they _are_ the Hitachiin twins."

"Yeah."

"Look...if you like Haruhi...I can..."

Kyoya shook his head, figuring it was his turn to laugh, "Not a chance. Haruhi isn't in my interest at the moment."

Tamaki laughed too, more relieved than anything, "I guess that's good then. You don't interest her either."

Kyoya glared playfully at Tamaki, taking it as an open invitation to a fake fight, "I say we fight over her," he joked.

Tamaki threw down his bag and rolled up his sleeves. Kyoya stood up and took a dive at him, wrapping his arms around his waist and took him to the floor. The two boys wrestled for a bit before Tamaki had him pinned to the ground.

Kyoya blushed, "Guess you win," he said. Part of him wondered if he had lost on purpose.

Tamaki raised the peace sign, "Nice fight...I guess."

Kyoya stuck out his tongue and pushed him off. Tamaki rolled over and opened up his bag to grab a change of clothes.

As Kyoya rose from the floor and started to walk back to his desk but cursed the air when he looked down at his pants. His bulge returned. He prayed and hoped Tamaki hadn't seen it.

Tamaki opened up his bag and laid out his homework, starting on it. Kyoya spent the rest of the hour trying to write while covering in manhood with the other hand.


	3. Chapter 3

AN: Sorry this has been taking so long for me to upload guys! I honestly didn't think I would be so busy that I couldn't ever work on it. But now that I have the "ok" to work on my fanfiction during work hours, I can upload a lot more often now. Again, I'm sorry it's taken me so long.

Chapter Three

The Kiss

Tamaki took his change of clothes and walked over to the bathroom door next to the far side of the room. He walked inside and shut the door behind him. Kyoya sighed a breath of relief when Tamaki was out of site. He put down his pencil next to his textbook and grabbed at his erection. It felt so good to grab it, and he was sure he could work it off before Tamaki got dressed and came back out, he wanted it that bad. He thought out whipped it out and doing just that. It was so exciting to think that Tamaki was naked just beyond a door.

He heard the water start in the bathroom and figured Tamaki was taking a shower. Kyoya closed his eyes and thought about Tamaki's naked body, dripping with water. His blond hair wet and shaggy and hiding his beautiful blue eyes. Kyoya slowly began to stroke his member, keeping the image burned into his head. Almost immediately, he felt his climax coming. His breathing escalated as he sped up. He shoulders tensed as he prepared for release…but stopped right before he got to.

He opened his eyes and looked down at his desk, marking the Ootori crest burned across the center. Almost all the furniture in the Ootori Mansion had the crest marked on it somewhere. He thought about his brothers and most importantly, his father. He thought about how strict they were and how much was expected of him. He wondered what they would say it they knew how Kyoya was, how he was feeling. Yes, the family dealt with queer customers from time to time, but to have one in the family would be devastating to the family business.

His erection died away and Kyoya took his hand from it, taking up his pencil and putting it to the page again. But he didn't write. His mind was elsewhere, racing about how his family could react to him being gay, if he even was gay. He lightly made swirling marks on the page with his pencil, absentmindedly. He started to wonder if there was something wrong with him. He figured he must be. How can a young man raised from a significantly wealthy and well respected family suddenly realize his love for another man? I'm sure other guys in the school didn't get erections from merely thinking about his best friend that just so happened to be a guy as well.

Kyoya hung his head low and let his pencil drop. It rolled down the desk and dropped onto the floor. He stared down at the floor. The question "Why me?" floated in his head. It was a silly question that popped up at the silliest of moments, but in this situation, he truly meant it. Why must it be him that went through this?

He got up from his chair and went to the small intercom panel next to his bedroom door. The panel had a single speaker and a array of buttons that led to different parts of the mansion. He pressed the button that said "kitchen" and waited for a reply.

There was a beep and a voice replied through the speaker, "Yes, Master Kyoya?"

Kyoya held the "talk" button down and spoke into the panel, "Would you be so kind to bring up two plates of the usual?"

"Would that be the usual snack or dinner, Master Kyoya?"

"Bring both, I'm quite hungry," he spoke.

"Right away."

Kyoya smiled, pleased and turned to go back to his desk. He gasped upon wheeling around when he saw Tamaki emerging from the bathroom. He had a white towel wrapped around his waist, exposing his bare chest. His blond, now darker than usual from being wet dripped with water that rolled down his shoulders and back. He didn't know why, but it really turned Kyoya on, and he looked at the floor and hurried back to his desk. He retrieved his pencil and began scribbling away to get his mind off of it.

He heard Tamaki walk from the bathroom to the center of the room and begin to dig in his bag. He felt a line of sweat forming on his forehead but he didn't dare wipe it off. He kept his focus on the paper, his pencil scrubbing a line back and forth in a quick motion, tearing a hole in the center of the page.

There was a knock at the door and Kyoya assumed Tamaki would answer it when he was finished changing. He heard the door open and one of his maid's voices.

"Two plates for the two Masters," the maid said. Tamaki thanked them and brought the plates to Kyoya. He took one and scooped at the sushi with a pair of chopsticks.

"Is there something wrong?" Tamaki asked, generally concerned that there actually was, "I mean, you seem not yourself today."

"I don't feel like myself either," Kyoya answered, completely forget his manners and talking with his mouth full, "But it's really nothing."

Tamaki swirled the points of his chopsticks in his bowl, "Are you sure it's ok for me to be here?"

Kyoya laughed, "Actually, it's not ok, there's no room," Tamaki looked upset for a moment but then realized the joke and smiled. Of course there was room, "It's fine, it that's what you're worried about."

Tamaki seemed to relax a little, and he pressed some more food into his mouth.

OoOOoo

It was one in the morning. Kyoya was laying on his bed with the lights off, but couldn't be more awake. The sounds of Tamaki's steady breathing emanated through the room, telling Kyoya he was asleep. He was tucked in a bundle of blankets on the floor a couple of feet away from the bed.

Kyoya rolled over and peered down at Tamaki for the fifth time since the lights went out. He was in the same position, right on his back, his profile outlined with the moonlight shining through the window. Kyoya watched as his chest rose and fell steadily with each breath. He looked so perfect, like a model sleeping.

As he stared at him, he couldn't help but wonder what it would be like to kiss him. Just the thought by itself got Kyoya excited. He thought about stealing a kiss while he slept, but he quickly pushed that from his mind. What if Tamaki woke up?

He rolled back onto the bed and thought about it. He would love to kiss Tamaki right now. He figured his lips had to be so soft. They probably fit right over Kyoya's. He bit his lip, thinking about how it would taste. He probably tasted delicious.

With that thought, he climbed down to the floor and crawled over to Tamaki. He stopped inches from his face. Tamaki didn't stir one bit, but that didn't stop Kyoya from wondering. He hesitated. Suddenly everything he was doing sounded so loud. His breathing, his movements, his heartbeat, all sounded like hammer on wood. Even so, with all the noise, Tamaki didn't even twitch.

Kyoya took a deep breath and closed his eyes, figuring he should just do since he was so close. Without a second more hesitation, he dove into Tamaki, pressing their lips together. He only meant to do a small kiss and draw back, but his lips fit perfectly with Tamaki's, like a glove. And the way he smelled made everything intensify.

It wasn't too long before he added his tongue, tasting Tamaki. He tasted sweeter than candy! He felt his body go hot all over, his breathed quickened. He was completely submerged into the kiss, he didn't realize Tamaki had awakened until he sat up, and scooted back from Kyoya.

Kyoya opened his eyes to look at his friend. Any bits of passion he felt just a moment ago were replaced with fear. He hoped maybe Tamaki didn't notice the kiss, but even in the darkness, he could tell by Tamaki's expression that he had. His large blue eyes were wide with shock, his mouth agape.

Kyoya felt tears welling in his eyes and his fists clench. He suddenly felt dumb for ever touching Tamaki and it made him angry that he even allowed himself to.

"I'm sorry..." he said slowly.

Tamaki shook his head, "Kyoya...what did you..."

"I fucking kissed you," he remarked quickly, his mouth twitching from swearing, which he hardly ever allowed himself to do.

"Kyoya..."

Kyoya stood up and wiped at his eyes. Tamaki watched as he walked to the door, grabbing his coat and then let himself out without even pausing to put it on. He sat in the dark, staring at the spot where he last saw Kyoya. He blinked, wondering why Kyoya kissed him.

Tamaki saw a bolt of lightning outside and thunder follow. He wondered why it always had to rain in situations like this, even in the movies. The thought may have made him laugh any other time but now. He stood up from the ground and rushed over to the door. He ran down the staircase to the first floor and continued to run. At the main door, where he left them, were his shoes. He slipped them on with a quick motion and opened the main door, running out into the storm.

"Kyoya! Wait!"

A/N: Next chapter will be done faster, I promise!


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter Four

Broken

The rain poured down heavily onto Tamaki's head. His blond hair became thick with water and he rushed down the long driveway to the gateway leaving the Ootori estate. Kyoya must have ran fast, for Tamaki couldn't see any traces of him. He only hoped he could catch up to him.

As his feet flopped into the puddles, Tamaki's mind raced off to only a moment ago. Why had Kyoya kissed him? Was he kidding around? He figured right away it wasn't a joke by the way he ran off like that. As far as Tamaki was concerned, Kyoya had never kissed anyone. He didn't even have feelings for anyone, yet why had he woken up to find him straddled over his waist, their lips connected?

He had so many questions.

He found the large gate with the Ootori crest wide open. Kyoya must have ran through it and kept running. Tamaki stopped in front of it and grabbed the bars as though to help him stand. He looked down at the rain splashing into the ground. His mind raced back to his first kiss only a few days ago. Suddenly, it seemed much longer ago than a few days, but he remembered it vividly.

Haruhi had been wearing a pink sundress. Tamaki couldn't believe it and kept trying to take photos with his cell phone, but Haruhi yelled at him to stop. In fact, during the entire date, it seemed Haruhi wasn't enjoying herself. Tamaki wondered why she even agreed to go on the date at all.

It was around dinner time when they noticed, in the back tables, the red-headed troublesome twins Hikaru and Kaoru. It was so much like the twins, to be so nosy on a date between them.

Haruhi had leaned into the table, closer to Tamaki, and smiled, "Let's throw them for a loop," she had said, and before Tamaki could ask what she meant, she leaned forward and pressed her lips against his in a kiss. It wasn't a full, passionate kiss, but a quick satisfying smack on the lips. Tamaki remembered his face flush. It was so unlike Haruhi to play a joke on the twins by kissing someone. It completely took him off guard.

Tamaki gripped the gate's bar tighter. It's not like he didn't Haruhi. He would have loved to kiss her so many times. He actually liked kissing her at the date. But suddenly, after being kissed by someone with such passion, even if he wasn't meant to feel it, the kiss from Haruhi seemed empty.

He looked up from the ground and noticed a tall, figure standing by the street corner at the bus stop sign. The figure was pacing nervously, and as he turned to face Tamaki's direction, Tamaki noticed a glimmer of light refract off of the figure's glasses. He knew right away it was Kyoya. Tamaki let go of the gate and ran towards the figure. His loud, splashing footsteps gave him away, and Kyoya turned to face him, but didn't attempt to run this time.

He wiped at his face, and Tamaki wasn't sure it he was wiping at the rain or tears, "Is there something you'd like to ask me?" Kyoya asked.

Tamaki nodded, but didn't answer, suddenly forgetting all the questions he had in his mind only a moment ago.

Kyoya sighed and adjusted his glasses, "Let me guess, you want to know why?"

"Well, for starters, yes," Tamaki answered.

"I don't know why," Kyoya said. He shoved his hands in his pockets and stared at Tamaki coldly, "I kissed you because I wanted to, but I don't have a reason why."

Tamaki looked away, avoiding Kyoya's hard stare, "Kyoya...are you...?"

"Gay?" he finished with a sharp bite in his tone, "Don't insult me, Suoh. Let's just say I'm confused. I don't want to be called a faggot right now."

"I didn't call you a faggot!" Tamaki snapped back. Suddenly, all his questions returned, "Why don't you tell me why you kissed me? And why you did it while I was sleeping?"

Kyoya shook his head, "Forget it, I'm not talking anymore," and with that said, he turned his back as though he was to continue waiting for the bus stop.

Tamaki angrily put his hand on Kyoya's shoulder and turned him back around, "I'm not putting up with your stay-out-of-it attitude tonight," he said, "You need to answer me."

Kyoya looked at Tamaki in disbelief. He had never seen an angry side to Tamaki before. He wondered if he was angry because he was kissed by Kyoya or because Kyoya wouldn't answer the question. Regardless, he answered, "I guess you can say I have a crush on you."

"A crush?" Tamaki echoed.

"No," Kyoya said, shaking his head, "I love you."

"You love me?" Tamaki said, and then he removed his hand from Kyoya's shoulder and looked at the ground again. He thought for a moment. Kyoya loved him? But why?

"I kissed you when you were asleep so you wouldn't know," Kyoya continued by answering his other question, "I shouldn't have without your permission. I'm sorry."

Tamaki shrugged, confused on weather to say it was ok that he had kissed him or "ok" in response to his apology, "Well, can you at least come back to your house?"

"Why?"

"We can talk out of the rain," Tamaki said, "Come on..."

Kyoya look up at the sky. The rain fell in huge drops onto his face. His dark, black hair hung drenched down his back, "I was raised to uphold the family honor," Kyoya thought out loud, "Sworn to present the family in such a way that made the world see us as untouchable. Unrelated. I was raised to make us seem one of a kind."

Tamaki didn't quite know what Kyoya was talking about, and merely stood there quite, listening.

"And here I stand!" he shouted, "About to re-enter my family's house a confirmed faggot, one of the many things I was raised never to be. I'm an embarrassment to my family."

Kyoya's words tugged at Tamaki's heart. They flowed smooth, yet struck like thunder. It was like hearing Kyoya recite a poem, "You're still a good person, Kyoya," Tamaki said, finally, "You're not an embarrassment."

Kyoya titled his head back down and headed towards the Ootori Estate, "Let's go."

A/N: Sorry for the short chapter. I am trying to at least get one more chapter uploaded in case I don't get a chance to upload this week. Thanks for the reviews. You people inspire me!


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter Five

Experimenting

As Kyoya and Tamaki reached the Ootori Estate, Kyoya found himself unable to look anyone in the eyes. He led Tamaki through the main hall and up the main staircase to the upstairs corridors without even as much as a glance from the ground. They reached the top of the stairs and the two boys turned to the left, walking down the rest of the corridor to his room.

As they rounded the corner, one of the doors ahead opened up and Kyoya couldn't help but look to see who could be up so late at night. Down this corridor, all four doors led to Kyoya's two brothers and sister, as well as his own room. So it was a surprise to him to see Ayaka, one of the housemaids exit his older brother's room. It took him a moment to piece together why she was up so late at night. All of the maids clocked out before nine at night, usually afterward they would either go run errands or go to sleep in the back hallway leading to the maid's quarters. And Kyoya remembered distinctly being tipped off by one of the other maids, saying that Ayaka may be sleeping with one of the Ootori brothers.

Ayaka was fixing her hair, as though it was out of place, and then fidgeted around with her apron, which was twisted over to the side. As Kyoya looked closely, he noticed her black stockings, which were the uniform for all the maids, were missing. Her bare legs glowed yellow in the dimly-lit hallway, but still had perfect definition in the shadows.

As the two boys neared her, she gasped and then covered her mouth to hush herself. Kyoya only stopped to smirk in front of her.

"M-Master Ootori," she said, "Excuse me. I was only going for a walk."

"Oh?" Kyoya said, raising his eyebrow to increase his intimidation, "You know roaming any corridors of the Ootori mansion other than the ones in the maid's quarters are forbidden after nine? I could have you fired."

Ayaka twiddled her fingers in front of her. Her smile was tight and tensed, "I would hope you wouldn't fire me on such a petty rule. Especially if this is the only rule I broke in my entire employment with your family, Ootori-san," to show her apology, she bowed very low.

Kyoya smiled slowly and shook his head, "This isn't your first offense, because you've been caught down here before," Ayaka's eyes shifted from Kyoya to Tamaki really fast, as though doing so would save her skin from hot water.

"I'm sorry, Master Ootori," she said, "You are right."

"And," he continued, "You also weren't roaming the halls. You were roaming Itsuki's bedsheets."

Ayaka's eyes widened, and her fists clenched, but she didn't respond.

Kyoya leaned into her as though to tell her a secret, but he spoke clearly, "Do you love my brother, Itsuki?"

Ayaka looked at Kyoya, afraid to answer, but did anyway, "Y-yes. I do, Master Ootori."

"Are you sure?" he asked, "You aren't just roaming his bedside to get a fair share of the family fortune?"

"Why, no, Master Ootori."

Kyoya nodded, "Good, because you would be a fool. The family fortune is going to my older brother Kanto," he glared at Ayaka, as though to figure out if something in her eyes changed. Disappointment or anger, anything to indicate that Ayaka was after more than only Itsuki. Unexpectedly, her expression remained the same: scared beyond all reason.

"Master Ootori..." she said, "I know it's not my place to be here at night, nor is it professional of me to be in your brother's room while employed with you."

"You're right," Kyoya said, still leaning into her intimidatingly close, "I suppose you need to answer a tough question. What matters to you more right now: Itsuki or your job?"

Ayaka hung her head low. Both choices were tough decisions to her, and to choose one on the spot was heart breaking.

"I really love Itsuki..." she whispered.

"Enough to lose your job?" Kyoya pried.

Ayaka didn't answer, but it was clear the answer was 'yes.'

Kyoya stood up straight, thinking to himself, "Well, now we're caught in a situation here. Do I fire her to let her keep the relationship with my brother, or do I let her keep the job, but forbid anything from going further?" he shrugged, "What do you think Tamaki?"

Tamaki's eyes widened. He didn't expect to be brought into a family affair. He didn't know Ayaka or even Kyoya's brother Istuki, so to be brought into a situation was a bit uncomfortable. He was used to Kyoya intimidating people through threats or blackmail, but he never did it with such force and hostility before. Kyoya was a bit off his game today, so Tamaki figured that was the reason behind this ridiculous ordeal with how he was treating Ayaka.

"I don't know," Tamaki answered, "She loves Istuki, but I bet she loves her job, too."

Kyoya nodded, "That's apparent," he turned towards Ayaka, who had tears welling in her eyes, blurring her vision and threatening to roll down her cheeks at any moment, "I will pretend this never happened tonight," he said.

"Sir?" Ayaka asked, in disbelief with Kyoya's decision.

"Go back in his room, and go fetch your stockings," he continued.

Ayaka looked down at her bare legs and gasped, just noticing she had forgotten them, "Ah, yes, Master Ootori," and he excused herself back into Itsuki's room. She was only in there for a few seconds and she returned outside the door, slowly closing it, her black stockings clenched in her fists.

"In addition, what you do is your own business," he said, "You're an adult, so I can't tell you what or what not to do and expect you to listen. But I can _ask _to you question yourself what is more important to you: Itsuki or your job? For the time being I'm letting you keep both. But when you do decide, you should at least not let me catch you in the act again. Understand?"

Ayaka wiped at her tears and bowed for a long time, "Thank you, Master Ootori, I will do just that. Is there anything else you would like me to do for you?"

"Yes," Kyoya said with a nod, "Please be sure to wash your uniform before tomorrow."

Ayaka nodded and smiled nervously, "Yes, Master. I will go wash everything now."

Kyoya looked pleased to see her walk off quickly back to the maid's quarters. He expected the next day Itsuki would confront him about everything that happened, but Kyoya wasn't worried about it. He merely continued to walk down the rest of the corridor to his bedroom door. With a quick turn on the knob, he opened the door and the two boys walked back inside.

He plopped down on his bed and Tamaki resumed his spot on the floor. As he looked up at Kyoya, he was reminded of waking up to see him locking lips with him. The memory sent shivers down his spine, but some how it didn't bother him.

"Do you think she is cute?" Tamaki asked, to derail his thoughts away from the memory.

Kyoya shook his head, "There's something about women that are already taken that makes them unattractive. Maybe it's my conscience telling me to stay away."

"Are there _any_ girls who look attractive to you?"

"You mean more than yourself?" Kyoya asked. Tamaki's face flushed bright red when he said that. Kyoya couldn't help but think he looked so adorable when he blushed, "There are some cute ones. At the club, I mean. Some others that are maids, I suppose. None of them really turn me on enough to pursue them. Not more than you have, I mean."

Tamaki scratched the back of his head. He had been called good-looking before, but to hear someone say it with such sincerity gave him a weird, warm feeling. He hated to admit it, but he liked it.

"How about you?" Kyoya asked, "Do you find any girls attractive?"

That was an easy question for Tamaki, "Yes, plenty. I think all the girls at the club are pretty. None of my maids at home are, they're a little older than the ones you have here," he thought a moment, "I really thought Haruhi was cute..."

Haruhi's name struck a cord with Kyoya. His expression turned hard upon hearing it, "Haruhi is cute at the most," he said, almost insultingly, "But there are plenty of better looking women in the club. Look at Renge."

Tamaki thought about Renge. He had to admit, Renge was a diamond in the rough when it came to attractive girls. Her baby face was cute, but her body didn't match her completely. She had the body of a woman, the complete opposite of her face. Her boobs were perfectly proportioned with her toned torso, and her perfect legs were soft, but still firm. And to top it off, she had an attractive backside too. Normally, the school uniform would cover up such things, but Renge was known to cosplay, sometimes in skimpy outfits, too. So Tamaki knew almost all the areas of her body. Her physique was enough to make a man drool, but Tamaki didn't stir as he thought about her.

"She is very good-looking," Tamaki agreed, "But not more than Haruhi. Or should I say not _like _Haruhi. Haruhi is pretty in her own way."

Kyoya couldn't disagree. Haruhi did have a certain charm that didn't appear often in the girls he had met. Still, it wasn't enough to say she was good-looking, at least in Kyoya's opinion.

"How about men?" Kyoya asked, dropping the ultimate question. Tamaki's blush deepened, "Do you ever think about men?"

Tamaki thought for a moment, "I do," he said finally, but then quickly added, "But never in a way that I would date anyone. I just never thought about it. I thought it would never come about."

Kyoya shook his head, "You know damn well a lot of young men at school want you," he said smoothly, "The gay _and _the straight ones all want the Host Club King."

Tamaki shrugged. He had to admit, he knew about a few men crushing on him. He didn't mind it, but now that one of them was someone he was close to had acted upon it, it was scaring him.

"You just have the most exotic looks," Kyoya added, "You're an odd mix: French and Japanese. You look like one of us but your hair is so different. No one with looks like ours have blond hair. Automatically, people will look at you. Soon enough, they will want you."

Tamaki smiled nervously, "Geez, you're making me blush."

"Am I turning you on?" Kyoya joked. He laughed shortly and adjusted his glasses.

"Yes," Tamaki admitted. That took Kyoya by surprised and he stopped laughing. He stood quite for a moment, staring into Tamaki's eyes, hoping he would show signs on him joking, but he didn't.

"How can you be?" Kyoya asked.

Tamaki got up from the floor and joined Kyoya on the bed, sitting right next to him. Kyoya could feel the body heat coming from Tamaki, and it drove him crazy. He just wanted to grab him and kiss him again.

"Enough of the questions, Kyoya," Tamaki said sternly, "Time for you to start answering," Kyoya gulped, back Tamaki continued, "What else looks so exotic about me?"

Kyoya didn't have to think to answer. He took his hand and placed it on the side of Tamaki's face, slowly tracing the outline of his facial structure, "Your jawline is softer than a Japanese's man. It makes you appear innocent like a child."

"What else?" Tamaki asked.

Kyoya finished tracing the jaw and made it to Tamaki's chin, "Your lips," he stammered, running his thumb across Tamaki's bottom lip, "They are thinner than usual..."

"Is that a good thing?"

"Very good..." Kyoya whispered, and couldn't help himself anymore. He sealed the gap between them with his own lips, kissing Tamaki once again. He expected Tamaki to draw back or push him away, but he actually sat still and let him be kissed.

Kyoya quickly broke the kiss, completely taken aback by Tamaki allowing the kiss to happen. He was about to apologize, but Tamaki leaned into Kyoya, and kissed him back. He could tell by the quickening of Tamaki's breath that he meant it. Kyoya couldn't control himself. He brought his hands to Tamaki's hair. It was still wet from going out into the storm, but it felt so good to run his hands through it. He felt Tamaki's tongue enter his mouth, and Kyoya couldn't help but feel the need to rip Tamaki's clothes off and take him. He pulled at the bottom of Tamaki's shirt, half expecting Tamaki to draw back. But he merely broke the kiss, and took off his shirt himself.

Kyoya resumed the kiss, his hands traveling everywhere. He couldn't help but notice how soft Tamaki's skin was and how beautiful it looked in the dark. He felt muscles on Tamaki's shoulders that he never noticed was there before. He breathing got louder as he brought his hands to Tamaki's pant buckle. It was then that Tamaki softly broke the kiss and said, "No."

Kyoya dropped his hands. He felt bad for letting his thirst overcome him for a split second. He just took the moment to stare at Tamaki, his heart beating frantically from the crazed moment that just happened.

"I'm sorry," he said, "I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable."

Tamaki smiled, "It wasn't that..." he said, "I'm just afraid...of doing it now."

Kyoya nodded. He understood. He was afraid, too, "I love you, Tamaki."

Tamaki didn't seem surprised, "Do you?" Kyoya didn't respond, but he didn't need to, "Well, then. What matters to you more now: me or our friendship?"

"It's at a tie right now..." Kyoya replied, reminded of his similar question he asked Ayaka only a few moments ago.

Tamaki nodded, seeming pleased with his answer. He reached to the side of him and grabbed his shirt, pulling over his head, "I have to admit," he said, "I never thought I would like kissing a guy so much."

Kyoya smiled, "Thanks for reminding me how good it was to kiss you."

Tamaki blushed again, "I'm just confused on what I should do now."

Kyoya gave him a questioning look.

"I'll figure it out," he added, "I will let you know soon."

Kyoya felt it would have been perfect if Tamaki would have just said 'I love you too.' But he wasn't surprised to hear what Tamaki really thought.

"I won't pressure you to do anything," Kyoya said, "Take all the time you need to figure things out."

Tamaki nodded. He wanted to explain more to Kyoya, that he was suddenly deciding on either pursuing feelings with Haruhi or Kyoya, but he figured that telling Kyoya that would only complicate things. He was sure Kyoya already knew anyway, so he decided to keep that thought to himself.

"I _do _want to do this again," Tamaki said, "I really liked it. Didn't think I would, but I really did."

"Yeah?" Kyoya said, and he smiled, "You know where to find me."

A/N: I was so excited to write this chapter, I wanted to get this out as soon as possible. I was up pretty late writing it, too. Thanks for the kind reviews. You all make me want to keep writing! I thank those who have noticed my change in writing. My earlier fan fiction were written in middle school and high school, so the writing was a bit more childish and incorrect. I'm glad some people have noticed my improvements. I will update the next chapter ASAP!


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